I was once a National Socialist (AKA a Nazi), I was once the principal figure and individual who brought Luciferianism to the masses back in 1994-19996 and ran the Church of Lucifer with over 10k members. I have given lectures online in front of 1.5 million people on Paganism, twice and wrote three books on the occult. Everything in my life ran anathema to me being who and where I am today, if anything I lived amongst darkness for most of my life, I lived for the wickedness I grew up and reveled in. I was a person who was feared, reviled, hated, and otherwise someone who was a detriment to society at large.
About 8 years ago things began changing for me, rather abruptly at that, when realizations started hitting me out of the blue regarding my affiliations with Nazism, small things that snowballed and culminated in my leaving that life forever and actively working towards seeing to its end. These revelations which led to my leaving that life behind came out from nowhere, yet had a profound and sweeping impact on my life, as I began befriending people of all races, religions, sexualities, genders, age groups, socioeconomic backgrounds etcetera…
This same set of revelations didn’t strike me again until this year (2021) when I found out through ancestry DNA that I am Ashkenazi Jewish by ethnicity. I decided to study the people and culture of my Jewish heritage, reading numerous books on them, but each time I’d read tidbits on Judaism as well. These tidbits on Judaism and of course G-D began building and swelling within me to a fevers pitch and I soon found myself studying Judaism just as much as the culture and people. I found myself feeling entirely different about just about every facet of life, about my choices in life, and about G-D and decided then and there that Judaism was the path for me and my family. After 32 years, being a Priest in a Pagan path (known as Reverend Frederick Nagash), after all, I’d studied, done, and what I knew, G-D found me and opened up my heart, mind, and spirit.
I’m sure this sounds trite to some, I’m sure others will doubt me and that’s okay by me honestly, but Judaism has entirely changed me as an individual, as a father, as a husband, and as a spiritual being. Oddly enough, the same feelings I had in my revelations and decision to leave my life as a Nazi, I felt when learning about Judaism and the revelations that befell me therein. Eight years ago I was a changed man, no longer full of fear, hatred, and the like, now I am further changed by the light of the holiest of holies, which has led to yet another revelation in my life, G-D has plans for me.
No, I haven’t lost my mind, but if G-D led me to revelations about my past, then led me to Judaism, and now I am the Associate Director of Beyond Barriers, helping to combat division, extremism, and domestic terrorism, I believe G-D led me to this point. All of my knowledge of how extremism functions, how they recruit, the ideology, the historical revisionism, I use that today to combat it, this is G-D’s plan for me. G-D’s will be my will, I am his servant forever and ever, and I see now that every tribulation of my past, every knowledge I accrued of how the darkness functions, was to be used as a sword to strike at the heart of extremism and those who would seek to divide humanity. I no longer fear, I no longer hate, I no longer deny G-D, and my every day is full of love and joy and is more peaceful on my worse day, than the best day in my past.
As I denied G-D in my past, he saw to it that I didn’t end up like so many others, dead or in prison, he saw to it that I saw the errors in my ways and led me to a place in life that to the old me would seem unimaginable. G-D loves me, he’s transformed me and walked me out from the darkness and into the position where I am doing a lot of good in the world today fighting fear, hate, division, domestic terrorism, and the sort. This is how G-D loves me, and how G-D has transformed my life…